The Essay

Before hitting the “post” button, I need to be sure that the words on the screen reflect the current condition of my heart, as best as I understand at that moment. But when I finally do hit the button

S.E. Fairbanks
4 min readAug 19, 2021

“Sometimes I lie awake at night and I ask, “Is life a multiple choice test or is it a true or false test?” …Then a voice comes to me out of the dark and says, “We hate to tell you this but life is a thousand word essay.”
— Charles M. Schulz

The essay.

As a teacher, the essay is my best friend, and my worst, at the same time. A well-written essay can show me more about a student’s knowledge of facts, understanding of concepts, and ability to apply those facts and concepts to new situations, not to mention the character of the student doing the writing.

On the other hand, essays take significant time to read and grade well. So, a series of poorly written essays can turn an enjoyable afternoon grading into slog fest of red ink punctuated by periods of self-doubt and occasional sanity checks — -Why do I assign so many essay questions…I will never do this again.

But I do. I do it all over again, because there is something is the exploration of one’s heart and mind, and the attempt to put it onto paper, that true-false and multiple-choice questions cannot begin to approach. Our Scriptures, too, are more essays, poetry, and stories than bullet-point lists of historically verifiable records, empirical data, and concise theological statements about God. Why? I think, at least in part, it is because stories connect with our hearts in a way that raw data and information cannot. God is more less interested in my ability to pass a multiple-choice test about God, than my sincere intention to become a living essay written on the pages of my life as I journey with God.

Jennifer Cognard-Black, professor of English at Saint Mary’s College of Maryland, writes that “The essay has no fixed parameters apart from…telling the truth. An essay’s form and style is entirely dependent upon your purpose — and your audience.” I see this as I read the four gospels. Each author is attempting to tell the truth of their experience and their understanding of who Jesus was and what it meant for their lives and for those reading, and listening to, their accounts. Each gospel writer did this in a different way; choosing which stories to include and how to order them for the purpose of share the truth of Christ in the most meaningful way for those to whom they were writing.

The definition of “essay” is an attempt, and effort, or a try. So, as I venture into this new online essay writing endeavor, I do so with three primary goals in mind as I write:

  • First, as I write I hope to explore my own mind and heart in their connection to God, the world, and the people in my life. I hope to force myself beyond the surface level truth of mere knowledge into the deeper truth of the heart and soul. I desire to grow, think, and be changed. First and foremost, I write for myself.
  • Second, sharing my words with others requires a certain mix of vulnerability and certainty. Before hitting the “post” button, I need to be sure that the words on the screen reflect the current condition of my heart, as best as I understand at that moment. But when I finally do hit the button, my prayer is that you will be challenged, encouraged, and blessed by what you read.
  • Third, it is my hope that writing might become a source of income as two of my children are preparing for university, as the third prepares for grade school, and as my wife and I navigate this next season of our journey together in this world.

Some of the essays will be devotional in nature, as I’ve been doing recently with the Discipleship Prayer series. Others will delve deeper into specific topics, such as forgiveness in “Uncommon Forgiveness.” I will begin writing more essays based on my personal experiences and, from time to time, share some of my favorite photography, music, and other interests. Finally, I look forward to delving into the realm of short videos and podcasting.

Each essay, post, and story is both work and worship; study and devotion; contemplation and exhortation. Some days the words flow out like rushing water. Other days, writing a single sentence is exhausting. But, in the words of Paul, all is done for the purpose of giving glory to God and with the desire to learn, grow, and go deeper into holiness of thought, words, and life.

For now, most everything is being made available for both free and paid subscribers. As I move forward, some content will be made available only for paid subscribers.

Please comment, like, and share often.

Most importantly, join with us in doing everything in love.

→ If I must err, let it be in the direction of love…

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S.E. Fairbanks
S.E. Fairbanks

Written by S.E. Fairbanks

If I must err, let it be in the direction of love. I am a man in process of being perfected in love and growing in Christlikenes. DoEverythingInLove.com

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